Some questions for your friendly local mentalists

[Wakou]

Dear sir or madam,
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend homosexuality, for example, I will simply remind him or her that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other laws in Leviticus and Exodus and how to best follow them.

1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Leviticus 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. How should I deal with this?
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as stated in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Leviticus 15:19-24). The problem is, how can I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
4. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may buy slaves from the nations that are around us. A friend of mine claims that this applies to the Welsh, but not the French. Can you clarify?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
6. A friend of mine says that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Leviticus 10:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
7. Leviticus 20:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's Word is eternal and unchanging.

[cayton]

1, Try wipping up a vegimite sandwich to make peace with thy neighbour.
2, Judging by thout avatar i would say 3 donkeys, but down camden market you may get 5 chickens. gl.
3, They have several lines/grooves in there forehead. when these are most prominent, keep clear my son.
4, Yes it does, it has something to do with the exchange rate.
5, Yes, sunday is poker day. anyone who works on sundays shall be blugeoned by thout mouse.
6, Shellfish is the devils spawn, whilst homosexuals are close relatives to the sperm whale,
7, Wiggle room NO, u should have gone to spec savers.
I hope this helps, if not please call 0800 808080. if im busy please leave a message.

[shmeigle]

all the scriptures you are quoting is from the old testament.

when jesus was on earth he null and voided the old testament and started laying down the new laws and rules which his disciples put into verse and scripture combinely known as the new testament.

[Wakou]

Excellent! I know have a :
8) If, as a theologian friend of mine says, 'when jesus was on earth he null and voided the old testament' why do you still insist on quoting Leviticus whenever homosexuality is debated, but ignore the strictures on seafood and recommendations of slavery?

[tfeilding]

It's a bit old now, but this is one of my favourite West Wing clips: YouTube - "West Wing" - Biblical Quotes

[shmeigle]

Excellent! I know have a :
8) If, as a theologian friend of mine says, 'when jesus was on earth he null and voided the old testament' why do you still insist on quoting Leviticus whenever homosexuality is debated, but ignore the strictures on seafood and recommendations of slavery?

homesexuality is also condenmed in the new testament as part of a verse that goes to the effect that homosexuals will not have a place in gods kingdom.

found the verse (I Corinthians 6:9; 10)

[tfeilding]

The same Corinthians passage says that neither drunkards or fornicators will make it into the kingdom of heaven.

I reckon heaven is a pretty dull place.

As a side note... it should be pointed out that the bibles were not written in modern English but have instead been translated, perhaps across several languages, so to take every word of the bible as literal truth would be a mistake. Also, many of the passages were passed down verbally across many generations before being written down - so the whole thing is pretty much a bunch of chinese whispers.

[Wakou]

plus the fact that what was in the bible and what was not was decided by various popes etc, council of Trent and such. Also of course many documents have been found and interpreted in the last 2,000 years or so, new archaeological techniques throw new or different light on what the bible is or might have been. I still think that having my moral framework determined by people who lived in a middle-east desert over 2,000 years ago is a pretty bizarre way of living my life. Besides, I like Lobster Thermidor.

[cayton]

Excellent! I know have a :
8) If, as a theologian friend of mine says, 'when jesus was on earth he null and voided the old testament' why do you still insist on quoting Leviticus whenever homosexuality is debated, but ignore the strictures on seafood and recommendations of slavery?

8, To be fair, Jesus was that loud mouthed poker player who because he's there you have to listen too. But do we actually listen to them? EEErm no, They are full of it. So imo if he null and voided it MEH it means diddly squat. So the original rule stands, If you like any shell fish esp lobster you fookered

[rfph1]

The same Corinthians passage says that neither drunkards or fornicators will make it into the kingdom of heaven.

I reckon heaven is a pretty dull place.

As a side note... it should be pointed out that the bibles were not written in modern English but have instead been translated, perhaps across several languages, so to take every word of the bible as literal truth would be a mistake. Also, many of the passages were passed down verbally across many generations before being written down - so the whole thing is pretty much a bunch of chinese whispers.

YouTube - Life of Brian- Sermon on the Mount Scene